Tuesday, May 15, 2012

6 Things You Can Do To Attract Positivity into Your Life: Part 3 of 3

You know when someone feeds off of negativity because they are the ones that always seem to have something going wrong in their lives. They aren't any different than you or me; they just focus and dwell on the negative, so they get more of it. If you have heard yourself say these things: "It's always something." "It never ends." "The hits just keep on coming." "Why do these [negative] things always happen to me?" chances are you are the cause of all the negativity. Yes you! Take responsibility instead of playing the victim. You'll notice your life starting to look very differently from where you sit. Then back track and start this mini-series over.

I wanted to throw the above paragraph in because I think it's super important for us to be aware and take responsibility in life for any of this mini-series to work at all.

All of that being said...Yay! How to attract positivity into your life part 3 of 3 is here. If you missed Part 1 and Part 2, be sure to check those out before continuing on.

Now then, let’s get to it.

5. Believe that you deserve whatever you want.
Sometimes it’s easy to get down on yourself and stay in the rut of feeling like you just don’t deserve what you want. Maybe you think you don’t work hard enough, look good enough, aren’t smart enough, you name it. Insecurities and negativity spoken over our lives can really put a damper on our belief of deserving what we want.

My idea on this process might seem a little backwards but give this a try. I’ll use myself as an example. Say you (like me) want to make a positive impact on other people’s lives through motivational and encouraging words and showing lots of love to your fellow man. Perhaps you haven’t had any special training, no schooling, and it’s not like you’re a doctor with a clinical psychology private practice so you may ask yourself what is your expertise. Maybe you’ve never even really talked that much and when you do others appear as though they don’t give a rip.

You are set up to feel like you couldn’t possibly have anything to offer that people would want. Why bother? Well…I’m here to tell you that you can throw that thought right out the window! If you have something YOU want to do, there is no desire police that will stop you (barring illegal desires) from doing it. J You are the one holding the reigns to your own life, directing the horse in the direction you want it to go.

When you give yourself the liberty to believe that you have the right to go after what you want, regardless of experience, education, history, etc. you open yourself up to a whole new world of possibility. Not only will you feel empowered but you will feel inspired to do what is necessary to reach your goals.

Perhaps you do need to have that educational degree to practice in a clinical setting. If this is the case, you must understand this: When you believe that you deserve anything you desire, it is that preemptive nudge that gets you on the path to earning whatever it is you must earn, acquiring whatever you must acquire, or learning whatever you must learn in order to get wherever it is you want to go and be whoever it is you want to be.

Wow. What a doozie and a total mouthful, but it is a place to start. The rest will follow suit of that foundation and fall right into place.

6. Have a plan and work the plan
Remember that previous step; believe that you deserve whatever you want. You must do that before you make a plan and work it. Essentially this is because if you don’t believe, you won’t put forth the effort to plan and work towards your goals. You don’t want to be stuck on the wrong side of that dividing line.

So now that we believe that we deserve what we want, we go for it baby! We dream, believe, make plans, follow through with those plans and reach our goals. We truly will get whatever we want and attract all sorts of positive things into our lives.

It’s that simple and that hard. The simple part is knowing what we have to do, the hard part is actually doing it. That’s always the hard part. But a tire doesn’t get changed without a little elbow grease. Same as your life doesn’t end up where you want it unless you stir the wheel and shift the gears. Some of us live on autopilot; that is the dreadful side of the dividing line you don’t want to be on.

Tools. You need tools to iron out your dreams. I love to use Microsoft Word as a tool to make plans. I have tons of ideas written down (shoot I should make a backup copy again). I have projects that I want to accomplish outlined and anytime I have an event that I'm in charge of I make a plan that includes, ideas, needs, times, dates, etc. I get my mind organized on paper. Maybe that could help you too.

Also, I use a vision board. I have it hung in a place where I can see it every day. I include inspirational quotes, pictures of places I want to go, and words of encouragement. It is a reminder that I can have and do anything I want. It is a place where positivity is written over me and when I read it, it is spoken over my life. I am, in essence, convincing myself that I will accomplish my goals. We all know that once your mind is made up, little can stop you.


We can all attract positive things and who doesn’t want more positive things in their life? It’s not that difficult when your mind is in the right place. There is untold power in your mind. Put it to good use and get all the great things that your pretty little heart desires! Sometimes life throws us a few curveballs and of course we have to deal with those surprises appropriately. However, attracting positivity into your life can be consistent.

Enjoy Life,

In the words of a mother

Sunday, May 6, 2012

6 Things You Can Do To Attract Positivity into Your Life: Part 2 of 3

Remember last week’s 2 things you can do to attract positive things into your life? Here’s a refresher if you have forgotten.
1.    Wake up and recite 10 things you are grateful for.
2.    Speak out loud everyday what you want. Pause and pretend you already have it.

Moving on to numbers 3 and 4 on the list, here we go!

3. Use good manners
Simple enough. Just be nice to people. You don’t need to kiss a$$. That would prove to work just the opposite, but that’s another post. You just need to be polite and considerate.  Say please and thank you to absolutely ANYBODY that does ANYTHING for you. This includes your waiter, your child, your spouse, the janitor, your employee, your boss, your friend, the neighbor…ANYBODY! This will put others in a more positive mood around you which will then boost your positive energy and the gift just keeps on giving.

If you can, be the mood setter of every situation you find yourself in. You want to be able to bring others up to where you are instead of them dragging you down. Sincere politeness is one of the tools that can help you achieve this. It manifests positive energy. Positive energy is like food. It can sustain you and just like food when it’s prepared properly; it can be an enjoyable experience rather than simply calories to keep you moving. That’s boring. Energy in general will keep you moving but positive energy will have you happily soaring!

Also, gentlemen, please don’t forsake chivalry. I used to fight this because of my own silly insecurities, but now I’m in love with that elderly man that held the door open for me and my mother at the restaurant the other day. So go ahead and open that department store door for the ladies and wait for them to walk through. Put the lady’s coat on for her. Allow her to order first. Some women may be ungrateful but the majority who appreciate good old-fashioned courtesy will be obliged. Besides, it makes us feminine women feel secure. J (Shout out to my best cuz Kris who I argued with about this back in the day. You were right, I was wrong. You're smart, I'm stupid. You're pretty, I'm ugly.)

4. Be generous
“You get what you give.” “What goes around comes around.” “Karma’s a b*^&#.” “You reap what you sew.” You’ve all heard of these sayings. Obviously it’s a fundamental truth. It’s like the golden rule; treat others as you want to be treated. It is a universal law that absolutely no one can escape from.

This is why generosity is one of the greatest traits you can possess to attract positivity into your life. Of course you don’t want to give just to receive, in fact, that sort of defeats the purpose. True generosity has a heart condition that simply wants to bless, help, and make others happy. When you are truly generous, you can NOT and will NOT ever outrun the treasures that will be given to you.

Here are a few questions you can ask yourself to seek out your own motives for being generous. Are you generous because you want recognition and glory? Do you give so that others think you are rich and/or nice? Do you try and buy another’s love, approval, or affection? Do you give to others just to get something in return? If you answered yes to any of these questions – OOPS! - you unfortunately won’t be reaping too many positive things out of those motives. That’s okay, change it. Start giving just because people need what you have to give.

Side note: What you give doesn’t have to be monetary or wrapped or material. Some of us are more suited to give a shoulder to cry on, an ear to listen, advice to lend, or words of encouragement. Give what you know how to give and steadily work on expanding your generosity.

Everyone can use good manners and being generous is a trait that we all can work on. This week focus on using good manners with the people closest to you. Sometimes we are more polite to strangers than we are our own family. Also, try doing two generous things this week that you wouldn’t normally do. Perhaps pay for the people behind you in the drive-thru or stop and help the person broke down on the side of the road.
Thanks for reading! See y’all next week for part 3!

Graciously yours,
In the words of a mother